The Problems of Authoritarian Parenting in 1 Henry IV

Danielle Schmidgall 2010

The relationship between a father and his child is more important than one is led to believe, for the father does not exist solely for the purpose of providing for his family.  A father is now expected to play an instrumental role in raising his child, and the manner in which he does so affects how the child behaves.  Typically, the father is the disciplinarian because he has an authoritarian style of parenting and exerts control over the child through loving the child based on his or her behavior: more love goes to the well-behaved child.  This controlling nature and parenting style can quickly lead to delinquent behavior in the child, resulting in less love for the child.  Therefore, the father’s parenting style, method of control, expectations, and practice of conditional love influence the behavior of the child – for worse –  as evidenced by the relationship between King Henry and his son, Hal, in Shakespeare’s play, 1 Henry IV.  

According to Nancy Darling, PhD, MS, in her article, “Parenting Style and Its Correlates,” a variety of parenting styles exist that describes the normal differences in raising children, in terms of how the amount of support and warmth the parent provides the child with and the manner in which the parent controls the child.  One style is the indulgent parent who readily offers support and warmth to the child, but does not demand much of the child by being very lenient on rules and behavioral expectations.  A second style is the uninvolved parent who does not support or discipline the child, leaving the child to fend for him or herself by neglecting to give direction or compassion to the child.  Drastically different from this style, the authoritative parent gives adequate amount of assistance to the child and exerts the proper amount of control over the child.  These parents have reasonable standards of behavior for their children and discipline their children in a way that allows them to learn from their mistakes; this balance makes them the most beneficial parent.  The authoritarian style of parenting is the final of the four styles and is not very conducive to a successful and happy child.  An authoritarian parent places high demands and expectations on the child, requiring that the child follows the rules without question or explanation (Darling).

  King Henry employs the authoritarian style of parenting with Hal by forcing Hal to live up to unreasonably high expectations.  He wants Hal to be a responsible, impeccably behaved young man, acting in ways that reflect well on his father’s reputation as king.  In an attempt to force Hal to behave according to his high standards, King Henry exerts psychological control over his son “through use of parenting practices such as guilt induction, withdrawal of love, or shaming” (Darling).  The King frequently denounces his son, seeking to reject that they are of the same blood because he is ashamed of his actions, stating in act 1, scene 1:

Whilst I, by looking on the praise of him [Percy]
See riot and dishonor stain the brow
Of my young Harry.  O, that it could be proved
That some night-tripping fairy had exchanged
In cradle-clothes our children where they lay (83-87).

Essentially, King Henry wishes that his son was someone else and refuses to accept him for who he is.

The authoritarian style of parenting, with its firm expectations and regulations for behavior, has been linked to delinquent conduct in adolescents.  Research has indicated that individuals, particularly teenagers, “react badly to being controlled by others,” especially by overbearing parents who do not respect the need to experience life (Kerr and Stattin 124).  Attempting to control children, especially young adults, therefore, is not a productive idea because it is likely to result in negative behavior.  Another parental behavior that may lead to delinquent behavior in children is the manner in which they are disciplined and controlled.  Fathers, far more often than mothers, are the individuals who favor the authoritarian style and rely on power-assertive techniques to control their children, using physical punishments and verbal threats to exert authority (Bigner 71).  Harsh words and punishments can lead to disrespect for authority on the part of the child, causing more delinquent behavior.

Hal’s behavior is essentially that of a delinquent young adult who is seeking to rebel against the rigid authoritarian expectations of his father.  King Henry expects his son to be just like he was at his age: well-behaved, conscious of the feuds between nations, and prepared to be a king.  During a confrontation with his son, King Henry chooses to verbally threaten his son and compares his son to a foolish king who destroyed his reputation by prancing around the town, drinking and carousing with the commoners, just as Hal is doing.  King Henry is ashamed of his son and, in act 3, scene 2, says:

And in that very line, Harry, standest thou;
For thou hast lost thy princely privilege
With vile participation.  Not an eye
But is aweary of thy common sight,
Save mine, which hath desired to see thee more – (85-91).

Hal’s father degrades him for associating with who would be considered in modern times as ‘the bad crowd’ and tells him that he is a disgrace to the family name and the throne.

Adolescents are also pushed to either fulfill the lofty expectations of their parents and collapse under the pressure or completely disregard the expectations in favor of doing what they please.  A child who works to, for example, become valedictorian, star quarterback, and captain of the debate team sacrifices their physical, emotional, psychological, and social well-being and experiences an immense amount of stress that may result in a nervous breakdown.  According to clinical psychologist, Kristina Diener, “Since 1990, clinical depression in teens has reached near stratospheric proportions, with more than three million prescriptions for Prozac dispensed to adolescents between the ages of 10 and 19, and suicide rates at an astronomical all time high” (Diener).  Teenagers are sacrificing their health to satisfy the desires of their parents who wish to live vicariously through them, hoping to achieve a higher status through the success of their child.  Other children disregard the expectations of their parents and strive towards their own goals.  These goals may involve deliberately defying their parents by acting in a manner that opposes the expectations of their parents, as is the case with Hal in Shakespeare’s play.

Hal’s father pushes him to be a certain person, to represent certain values, to hold up his father’s reputation.  This places an immense amount pressure on Hal that he handles through rebelling against his father’s wishes.  Hal is attempting to exert his independence by rebelling against his father through choosing friends and activities that his father does not agree with or support.  King Henry feels as though he is being punished by Hal’s way of life and declares, in act 3, scene 2:

Could such inordinate and low desires,
Such poor, such bear, such lewd, such mean attempts
Such barren pleasures, rude society,
As thou art matched withal and grafted to,
Accompany the greatness of thy blood
And hold their level with thy princely heart? (11-17).

  Hal’s behavior, though he is acting as a fairly typical adolescent who is responding to an overbearing father, greatly disturbs his father.  The King is immensely bothered by Hal’s association with Falstaff who serves as a surrogate father because he listens to Hal and is interested in what he is doing, unlike his biological father who rejects him constantly.

This rejection is to be expected based on Erich Fromm’s theory of conditional love.  Fromm believed that the love a child receives from his or her father is conditional and hinges on the behavior of the child, unlike the unconditional and unvarying love of the mother.  A child can do no wrong in the mother’s eyes, but is constantly being monitored by the father.  Fromm declared, “…fatherly love has to be deserved, that it can be lost if one does not do what is expected.  In the nature of fatherly love lies the fact that obedience becomes the main virtue, that disobedience is the main sin – and its punishment the withdrawal of fatherly love” (Fromm 43).  A father can, therefore, control a child to the extent that the amount of love a child receives is directly related to the obedience of the child.

King Henry clearly exemplifies the theory of conditional love because he does not express feelings of love or acceptance to his disobedient son.  Hal does not agree with his father’s expectations and, therefore, does not behave in a way that will satisfy them.  If he does not satisfy his father, Hal is looked upon with scorn and is not loved or respected by his father.  For this reason, Hal looks to Falstaff as a substitute father because he does not treat him like his father does, but respects him for his individuality.  Falstaff listens to him, plays with him, respects him, and enjoys spending time with him, providing Hal with that which his father is not willing to give: understanding and acceptance.  King Henry accepts Hal as his son in the final scene of the play after Hal saves his father in battle and kills Hotspur – the son King Henry wished he had – and proves himself to be worthy of his father’s love by acting in a way that lived up to his father’s expectations.

As evidenced by the relationship between King Henry and Hal, the father and his methods of parenting greatly influence the behavior of the child.  In Hal’s case, the influence was for the worse because his father, with his lofty expectations for his son’s behavior, forces him to rebel against his wishes.  In turn, King Henry refuses to accept his son, ridiculing and belittling him for bringing shame to the family with his actions, retracting his conditional love to further punish Hal for his bad behavior.  Only when Hal finally acts in a way that corresponds with King Henry’s opinion of what his son should be does King Henry accept Hal as his son.  The father-son relationship between King Henry and Hal in 1 Henry IV, therefore, suggests that the authoritarian parenting style, strict control, unreasonably high expectations, and conditional love combine to create a delinquent child who can succeed only when he is left to come-of-age on his own terms and in his own time.    

 

WORKS CONSULTED

Bigner, Jerry, J.  Parent-Child Relations: An Introduction to Parenting.  New York: Macmillan Publishing Co., Inc., 1979.

Darling, Nancy, PhD, MS.  “Parenting Style and Its Correlates.”  ERIC Digest.  March 1999.  10 Nov. 2008.  <http://www.ericdigests.org/1999-4/parenting.htm>.

Diener, Kristina, Psy.D., BCTSE, SAP.  “Do You Have a Trophy Teen?”  Parenting Teens Resource Network.  10 Nov. 2008.             <http://www.parentingteensresourcenetwork.org/family/article.php?cat=3&id=36>.

Fromm, Erich.  The Art of Loving.  New York: Harper & Row, Publishers, Inc., 1962.

Green, Maureen.  Fathering.  New York: McGraw-Hill Book Company, 1976. 

Hauser, Stuart T., Sally I. Powers, and Gil G. Noam.  Adolescents and Their Families: Paths of Ego Development.  New York: The Free Press, 1991.

Kerr, Margaret, and Hakan Stattin.  “Parenting of Adolescents: Action or Reaction?”  Children’s Influence on Family Dynamics: The Neglected Side of Family Relationships.  Ed. Alan Booth and Ann C. Crouter.  New York: Lawrence Earlbaum Associates, 2003.  121-51.

Shakespeare, William.  “The First Part of King Henry the Fourth.”  The Necessary Shakespeare.   Ed. David Bevington.  New York: Pearson Longman, 2005.  370-411.